Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Hostility Has No Place, Here

I always read my email, first thing, on mornings where I and the pet are afforded the luxury of sleeping in. It is usually an activity that inspires many smiles, a few new musings, and at least one good laugh.

This morning, however, I was greeted by a comment on one of my blog postings.
It read, simply, "I hope you get lung cancer."

My immediate reaction was to delete this comment. It not only is negative, poisonously negative in fact, but it serves no purpose nor is it relevant to the discussion of the post.

However, the more I think on this, the more I realize that this type of behavior, the emotional lashing-out, goes far too far far too frequently, especially in sexually charged settings, such as my blog.

When a woman is comfortably and confidently overt in her sexuality, it does NOT give you permission to be a D-bag. You do not have permission to bombard her with either advances or moral chastisement, or a finely-blended neurotic buffet of anger/judgement/envy/hatred.

So many men, and a few women, have felt the utmost freedom to use harrassing, negative, aggressive, violent, and sometimes murderous speech when contacting/reacting to me and my writing, or in personal missives following what they perceive to be a lack of proper interaction.

It is stunning to me that the rules of social engagement do not apply in the minds of those who are online. It is not surprising, as we (humans) tend to feel far more free to be negative when we are hiding behind the ever-comfortable veil of anonymity. But it is still stunning.

No, it is not socially acceptable to be instantly sexual when contacting ANY woman or man.

No, you are not entitled to my time, attention, or services simply because you dropped a "Nice tits!" or somesuch phrase on a picture that is posted in one of my public profiles.

No, your anger and misplaced sexual repression-induced bile does not belong in my inbox after I politely and firmly set boundaries for communication.

The people behind the words and images, online, are real people.
I am a woman, Domme, wife, mother, worker, writer, and a myriad of other things.
I am not a dumping ground for your emotional toxic waste, and neither is any other person.

I encourage thoughtful comments on the blog, especially those that have a differing opinion to my own. We cannot grow, mentally or sexually, without the challenge and open dialogue of many and varied vantage points.

But, we must move forward in a respectful and positive manner.

I encourage everyone to recalibrate their online communication tactics.

Remember that you are, in fact, communicating with actual human beings.

Show respect for yourselves and those with whom you interact.

Your life, and your mindset, will be more positive.

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